Its that time of year again when Americans deliberately pay for nightmares that will last until next Halloween season, just in time for haunted houses to open again.
St. Louis is crawling with these haunted houses. But the question is, which haunted house is the scariest of all: the Darkness, the Haunting of Lemp Brewery, or Creepyworld?
The Darkness, voted best haunted house in St.Louis this year by the Riverfront Times and second best in the nation in 2011 by HauntWorld, is definitely deserving of its nationwide recognition.
Before even entering the house, I had already been approached and harassed by heart-stoppingly scary actors, though I might add that the “actor” part is the least obvious in the Darkness than in the other two attractions.
The true sign of a good haunted house is that you forget where you are- that these are payed actors and you’re actually completely safe. And its safe to say that I forgot this the moment I got in line at the Darkness.
Not one actor blew their cover and I was completely immersed in the nightmare for the whole ride. Every time someone or something jumped out at me, I lost feeling in my legs and instantly fell to the floor, just to give a gauge of how real it really felt.
On the other hand, the Creepyworld actors were much less convincing. In multiple circumstances, the actors abandoned their character and made normal conversation with me, a twenty-five dollar disappointment to say the least.
On top of that, at Creepyworld the actors don’t hesitate to touch and invade all personal space, a touch I found unpleasant and undesirable. But I mean, if you like a man holding a chainsaw with fake blood dripping down his face breathing in your ear and touching your face, be my guest.
If you’re looking for something a little bit scary, but a lot more uncomfortable, I would suggest Creepyworld.
It is split up into multiple houses and mazes so you get a break to catch your breath every few minutes or so. If you are easily frightened, this is to your advantage, and can be a comforting reality check for newbies. However, if you are looking to not sleep for weeks, the 400 lines you have to wait in between each house severely detract from the spooky experience.
And then there is the Haunting of Lemp Brewery. There is a lot of hype about this attraction because unlike the others, it is supposedly haunted “for real”; its said to be a hotspot of real paranormal activity.
Upon arrival, you travel 5 stories down a spiral staircase where you will continue to traverse through dark passages and caves.
Whether or not the Haunting of Lemp Brewery lives up to the taunting radio ads is up to you, but I suggest putting in some thought to what kind of bloodcurdling, hair-raising, nightmarish experience you like before investing last month’s paycheck.